death and all his friends

went for a tea party HERE.

take time to realise

to dream. to fight. and to actually get there.

Set me on the right track

On the day of the thousand, I woke up and thought to myself:

I think I'm just really selfish

Talk to me before I go, don't you know I'll miss you so?

Fifteen hours.

four days in the rain; four nights in the rain.

I stood for ages under the shower after training today. There were so many thoughts going on in my head. So many things I want to do, so many things I have to do, so many things I don't want to do. The balance is tipping, the boat's not moving as far as it should be. I wish time could stand still so I could stop and dream that little bit more. The pounding of water from the showerhead above. Don't lose focus? How do I not lose focus when there are so many of distractions pounding at the door? I really hope something good comes out of this. I really really hope so. Not my will, but God's will be done.

It's not the time to hold on.

Take time to realize
That your warmth is
Crashing down on in
Take time to realize
That I am on your side
Didn't I, didn't I tell you

But I can't spell it out for you
No it's never gonna be that simple
No I cant spell it out for you

If you just realize what I just realized
Then we'd be perfect for each other
And we'll never find another
Just realized what I just realized
We'd never have to wonder if
We missed out on each other now

Take time to realize
Oh oh I'm on your side
Didn't I, didn't I tell you
Take time to realize
This all can pass you by
Didn't I tell you

But I can't spell it out for you
No its never gonna be that simple
No I can't spell it out for you

It's not always the same
No it's never the same
If you don't feel it to
If you meet me half way
If you would meet me half way
It could be the same for you

Missed out on each other now
Missed out on each other now

But I feel, too.

Silence is the new noise;

When you remain silent, people hear you the loudest.

We have to fix this please. At this rate all we'll have is a history, but no future. Where's that passion and fire - that discipline and fighting spirit?

41 days

2 weeks to start of creatine load.

A little water clears us of this deed;

If sand could flow from present to past,
Would my better nature still hold fast?

to this beautiful moonlight;

Run far away
So I can breath
Although you're far from suffocating me
But I cant set my hopes too high
'Cause every hello ends with a goodbye

Press on.

It's not the boat, it's the rower. Nelo or advantage, I'll thank God.

So far away
I wish you were here
Before it's too late, this could all disappear
Before the doors close
And it comes to an end
With you by my side I will fight and defend
I'll fight and defend

Of Modern Ambition

Room rings with incessant noise.
taels of gold; silver;
culture - drowned.
Who pays attention
when they know not their debtor?

Mind's a mess;
drifting in clouds outside these
four walls.
These walls can't hold my dreams,
yet by order of nature they will.

Don't leave my hopes
hanging.

Snapshotland

I realise I avoid at great costs what I cannot handle.

It's too fragile to touch. Dare I?

Planetshakers - I Just Want You

More than a nice melody
More than the sweetest of words
This is love I have found
And with this love I am found

I just want You Jesus
I just want You my Lord
I just want You Jesus
I just want You

Never could I comprehend
The love You so freely gave
Never could I be worthy
But Your love covers all of my sin

There is no greater love than Yours
Nothing else could ever compare
And even if i search all the world
I will never find a love like Yours

From the Inside Out

A thousand times I've failed; still Your mercy remains.

There's no need to look outside your window;

Mmmm. I think she's rather pretty. Em too.

They can laugh all they want;

He gave her a flower, and that's more courage that I can ever gather.

gleich nicht

Though moths lay rest upon a butterfly's flow'r;
A glimpse of blest brine pen an hour's diction.

Every Breath (Lord Take it All)

Here I am
Humbled before You
Splendid Lord
Glorious King

All I am
Is in Your very hand
I am nothing
Without You

How can I live (I can't live)
A single day without You
How can I breathe (I can't breathe)
When You're not by my side
No longer I
But Christ who lives within me
Every breath
Lord take it all

Every breath
All I am
Lord take it all

It felt like it had just begun, when--

I always get that empty feeling at the end of a great novel or movie. No one wants to admit that it's the end.

Lincoln Brewster - The Power of Your Name

Surely children weren't made for the streets
And fathers were not made to leave
Surely this isn't how it should be
Let Your Kingdom come

Surely nations were not made for war
Or the broken meant to be ignored
Surely this just can't be what You saw
Let Your Kingdom come
Here in my heart

I will live to carry your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
I will give with the life that I've been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your Name

Surely life wasn't made to regret
And the lost were not made to forget
Surely faith without action is dead
Let Your Kingdom come
Lord break this heart

Jesus Your Name
Is a shelter for the hurting
Your Name
Is a refuge for the weak
Only Your Name
Can redeem the undeserving
Jesus Your Name
Holds everything I need

Cut through the water;

I will not glory in past achievements or in my present status, but I will glory in the future coming of the risen King.

It's raining outside;

Too many distractions, too little time. The air is thinning.

And I can't
Breathe without you
But I have to
Breathe without you
But I have to

Breathe;

Because words aren't worth it.

Our time is running out;

It's getting scarce. I'll make every minute count.

An episode out of television drama?

The demure sweet girl he barely knows or the good friend he's instinctively protective over?

Perhaps we'll know soon? In the next or the weeks to come.

Meditate upon:

"What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?" - Luke 9:25

Good evening, world

I love to excel at all I do, because I want to pass the knowledge and skill to those around me. I love to listen to the problems of those around me, because it reminds me that they are human, like me. I love to push my limits, because I know there's still so much more I can achieve. I love to evangelise, because I'm reminded of the time and effort others put into leading me back to God.

On a side note, whats wrong with my msn?

只对你有感觉

微笑再美再甜
不是你的都不特别

玩的再疯再野
你瞪一眼我就收敛

It's difficult, but possible

Some days he wished he could say to her:

To God be the glory

It was good to have confided in the Comforter, to have cast my cares upon Him, to hide His Word is my heart.

For God is faithful.

To God be the glory.

Dear God:

When you hit rock bottom, who do you turn to for counsel? Who do you turn to to cast your cares?

To love?

I hate this hypocrisy. I hate this injustice. But to love. What is to love?

Yet words scar.

Let go

It's just one of those days that I wish I could shut off all the noise around me. Yet not be alone.

Hillsong United - Love Enough

Your love's enough to see the broken heart
Gain a brand new start with a brand new heart
As the faithful hope in things unseen
You're enough to see all the things they dream
Come to life

We're living in the Saviour today
And this day is what we have now
In this moment we have chosen to praise
And it's changing how we live now

Your love it broke my fall
It's more than enough and I need it
'Cause I've never known better
And I'll never know better
This love will see me soar
It's more than enough and I need it
'Cause I've never known better
And I'll never know better

Your love's enough to see the humbled man
Find the cause of Christ
With his outstretched hands
As the cripple grabs his mat to walk
You're enough to save him from the pain he bore

My Saviour
You'll never let me go
My life is now secure
My Saviour
You'll never let me go
And in Your hands my future's brighter

'Then he said to them all: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."' (Luke 9:23) As disciples of Christ, we are called to deny our fleshy wants, our fleshly desires and follow Jesus. But it's not easy all the time isn't it. It's important therefore, that God must be sufficient for us even as we live our lives on Earth. When God's love is enough for us, we won't seek love from other areas of our lives, yet at the same time be able to love with a love without barriers. We were the joy set before Jesus when He died for us (Hebrews 12:2), and He is now the joy set before us (Philippians 3:14).

Is His love enough for us?

Planetshakers - All that I Want

My soul sings
To my Saviour King of Kings
I need You
You are everything to me

I love You
So much more than anything
I'll live for You
Jesus You are everything

You're all that I want
You're all that I need
You're all that I want
You're all that I live for in this world

Jesus You are all I need
Jesus You are everything

Planetshakers - Beautiful Saviour

Jesus
Beautiful Saviour
God of all majesty
Risen King

Lamb of God
Holy and righteous
Blessed Redeemer
Bright morning star

All the heavens shout Your praise
All creation bows to worship You

How wonderful, how beautiful
Name above every name
Exalted high
How wonderful, how beautiful
Jesus Your name
Name above every name
Jesus

I will sing forever
Jesus I love You
Jesus I love You

MercyMe - Bring The Rain

I can count a million times
People asking me how I
Can praise You with all that I’ve gone through
The question just amazes me
Can circumstances possibly
Change who I forever am in You

Maybe since my life was changed
Long before these rainy days
It’s never really ever crossed my mind
To turn my back on you oh Lord
My only shelter from the storms
But instead I draw closer through these times
So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know
There’ll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that’s what it takes to praise You
Jesus, bring the rain

I am Yours regardless of
The clouds that may loom above
Because You are much greater than my pain
You who made a way for me
By suffering Your destiny
So tell me what’s a little rain

Holy, Holy, Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy
Is the Lord God Almighty
Is the Lord God Almighty

Brandon Heath - Give Me Your Eyes

Looked down from a broken sky
Traced out by the city lights
My world from a mile high
Best seat in the house tonight
Touched down on the cold black top
Hold on for the sudden stop
Breathe in the familiar shock
Of confusion and chaos

All those people going somewhere
Why have I never cared?

Give me Your eyes for just one second
Give me Your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me Your love for humanity
Give me Your arms for the broken hearted
Ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me Your heart for the ones forgotten
Give me Your eyes so I can see
Yeah yeah

Step out on a busy street
See a girl and our eyes meet
Does her best to smile at me
To hide whats underneath
There's a man just to her right
Black suit and a bright red tie
Too ashamed to tell his wife
He's out of work
He's buying time

I've been there a million times
A couple of million eyes
Just moving past me by
I swear I never thought that I was wrong
Well I want a second glance
So give me a second chance
To see the way you see the people all along

Casting Crowns - Praise You In The Storm

I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again I say amen
And it's still raining

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I'll raise my hands and praise
The God who gives and takes away

And I'll praise you in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
And raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

I lift my eyes onto the hills
Where does my help come from
My help comes from the Lord
The maker of heaven and earth

Brenton Brown - Lord Reign In Me

Over all the earth
You reign on high
Every mountain stream
Every sunset sky
But my one request
Lord my only aim
Is that You'd reign in me again

Lord reign in me
Reign in Your power
Over all my dreams
In my darkest hour
You are the Lord
Of all I am
So won't You reign in me again

Over every thought
Over every word
May my life reflect
The beauty of my Lord
Cause you mean more to me
Than any earthly thing
So won't You reign in me again

Hmm I've decided that a blog is actually quite pointless, since I don't really post stuff about my life (not like anyone would be interested anyway), and I don't take pictures of myself or where I go. I've meant for this to be somewhere I can cast my thoughts and feelings about life where I am, but these thoughts and feelings are sometimes critical and of rather sensitive issues and would not be shedding any positive light on the mentioned areas. But I still enjoy writing - quite a bit at least - so I'll ink down my thoughts somewhere. Haha, so I'll just leave this site up for the music when I'm doing work. By the way, post count stands at 64. Cheerios (:

To love is to obey. I'm praying for change.

When life's not going your way, and you want to break the patterns of routine.

what words can't satisfy, what hurts can't falsify. love is in the air, but they know not Love.

Things are so much more precious when you fight hard to earn it.

Hmm. The irony of a world-class education system.

I've found my direction in life, and nothing shall deter me from doing the will of my God.

Find a need and meet it. Find a hurt and heal it.

15 souls. Lord, give me faith that I may believe.

Will I give up my life for them?

Unconditional love. Unconditional acceptance. Unconditional forgiveness.

Sigh. Emotional rollercoaster. I wish things were as simple as they used to be.

The irony of grades.

It's hard to be humble and praise God when we do well in something, but it's even harder to be thankful and praise God when we do badly in something.

Thank You, Lord.

Thank you, Lord.

Some people are just irreplaceable. It's no longer the same.

Those were needles in a haystack. And I'm the magnet who always attracts these stupid needles. The more I try to stay out of it, the more pricks I get. And it's getting increasing worse.

Sigh.

Mein Deutsch ist nicht gut. Nein, überhaupt nicht. Ich verstehe mein Deutschlehrerin gut nicht. Aber sie möchte mir die Note A1 für Deutsch in den O-Level Examina bekommen. Ich kann zu träumen weitermachen... Ich denke, dass ich sollte meine Deutsch jeden Tag studieren ):

Zzz. Tired, tired, tired. And everyone's either offline, busy or dao-ing. I'm going to sleep early tonight.

Matthew says that new year resolutions are bad. So here are three simple new year godly goals.

Respect and honour authorities. I realised I haven't really been showing much respect to Weejinn and Eddy during cell - constantly interrupting them with irrelevant and distracting comments. If you see this I want you to know I'm sorry ): I'll sit quietly and listen to you when you're teaching. And I realise I've been sleeping alot in class, which is plain disrespectful to the teachers. Sorry, I will do everything within my ability to stay awake during class now, like sleeping earlier during the school term by starting to prepare for my exams now and not leaving my projects to the last minute.

Respect and honour others. I realise I've have been making many negative remarks about people around me. Even though it's less than before, I resolve to fully abstain from gossiping and judging. And I've been interrupting a lot when my cell members share and showing disrespect through my sitting posture. Really sorry, forgive me please ):

Consecrate time each day to seek God, pray and reflect. I realise that my quiet time has been highly inconsistent throughout the holidays, even though I supposedly have more time. Despite my busy school day, I resolve to do my quiet time everyday, as well as pray and intercede for others. I recently got a planner from my mum, and I believe that God wants me to use it to record and meditate on my learning points, as well as to pen down intercession and prayer items daily. And I resolve to keep my eyes focused on God, not taking things into my own hands or being distracted.

Yup, that's about it. Only three this year, but that'll keep me busy enough. If anyone wants to, you could share your resolutions with me. We could be accountability partners and pray for each other (:

Alot of sacrifices to be made, but I like what pastor shared during service today from 2 Samuel 24:24 - 'But [king David] replied to Araunah, "No, I insist on paying you for it. I will not sacrifice to the Lord my God burnt offerings that cost me nothing."' Costly sacrifices have to be made, if I'm to live life as God intended - plan A living.

All these I entrust to God. Holy Spirit, guide and teach me the the Your ways.

My God. No, seriously. That's the name of the song (:

Your faithful love
Has always been there for me
The greatest love
That I have ever known

What can I give to You?
For all You’ve given to me
You gave it all
And You are all I need

You are my King
You are my God
The praises I bring
Come from my heart

This is for You
For all You’ve done for me
And I wanted to show You
How much You mean
My God, my God

Sigh. This is starting to happen too frequently. Wake up early in the morning, rush around everywhere. Reach home in the late evening so tired that I immediately fall asleep, and wake up at in the middle of the night. At least it's a Sunday today.

Need to start mugging. I even had a dream that made me more convinced I should start studying now. I need to locate the handwritten notes I copied out last year. I'm going to type them out now.

Anyway, life in school feels very unfamiliar without Mr See. I miss his scoldings. And all the interesting canoeing stories that I probably won't hear anywhere else. You've got to admit he has the passion and the wisdom to train up a bunch of slack and lazy boys into refined gentlemen who'll strive even in the toughest of conditions. Thank you, Sir. Come back soon (:

And yes. Everyone's convinced that I am emo. And having 'girl problems'. I have a more reflective side of myself that is a tiny bit quieter, that's all. And I shall quote Nic Low regarding 'girl problems' - "My girlfriend is my studies and my training."

New year. Fresh start. Time to do up the class seating plan.

Thank God. Everything is finally settled (:

36km SCF marathon next Sunday with Nicholas Ng. Canoeing clashes with Sunday service.

We're moving boats from MacRitchie to Kallang tomorrow. Mr Jonathan Ng is retiring as captain of the 12th (I) company tomorrow. Canoeing clashes with BB.

MOELC just arranged for my German lessons to be on Monday. Canoeing clashes with 3rd language.

And I just spent two and a half hours repinning the badges on my chevron.

Not exactly a fantastic way to start the year. My head's already hurting on the second day of the year. Both figuratively and literally - owing to the falling broom thrown by Darren in his attempt to retrieve someone's passport cover stuck near the ceiling.

Ah well, at least I'm still kicking and well alive. I thank God for seeing me through (:

The time has come. To be a super guai kia (:

Let me be a light shining for you as an example for many, dear Lord. Let me shine in my studies, in my commitments, in my words. Let my daily life be a worship and sacrifice unto Your name, and may all glory be unto You, today and for all eternity.

Happy new year (: